Day 21: Slept early last night. Delete most emails without looking at them, except I see that ebay saved search alerts has found my white whale.
The Ralph Lauren Larchmont Cross Body Bag was a love on first sight, but by the time I spied the it was late 2012 and it was already sold out at most retailers. If not for shop-stinance, I would have snapped this up right away. Instead I put a watch on this bag and will see if someone else picks it up before my time is up.
Today while talking to Cindy, she mentioned that she found her “addiction”. Her addiction was that she likes picking up new hobbies/selling items and has an incontrollable desire to do these things because she’s head over heels for it in that moment and that it’s annoying. Soon after she’s done obsessing over the hobby of the moment, she moves onto the next one.
To be clear, Addiction is the continued repetition of a behavior despite adverse consequences. I generally disagree with the negative connotation of being passionate about anything, as an addiction. We all have things that we’re excited about, that we want to yell out to the world that we love, but is that despite adverse consequences? Not necessarily.
Much like I mention in an earlier post, shopping is hobby of mine that I am very much in love with. I enjoy the hunt, where my prey is something uniquely detailed and special, that magically fits within how I conceive my world to be. We all need something that gives us that thrill, infatuation, and feeling of love— we need it because it gives us something to be excited about.
Was watching this speech from Tavi Gevinson about a month ago from the Melbourne writers festival that fits in perfectly with this conversation. She speaks eloquently about fangirl-ing (or in Jessica speak ocding out) as a creative release. It makes you feel connected to the world, less alone, and you want to share this discovery with anyone and everyone. In the case of Cindy and I, our fangirl-ing doesn’t necessarily need to revolve around being a fan of people in particular, but rather can also apply to inanimate objects or activities.
ocding out — repeated thoughts, feelings, ideas, sensations obsessions, or behaviors that make them feel driven to do something, generally driven by love.(I mean if people are going to turn excitement over hobbies into a negative connotation, I’m going to make OCD behaviors into a positive one).
What do you fangirl/ocd out about?
On other topics, the other day my bff coworker comes into my office and he mentions “Hey, I finally read your blog thing, it’s actually well-written.” I sit on the word actually and stew. I’ve actually heard this quite a bit since I’ve re-started blogging. This stems from the “well-known” fact that I am not well-read (whatever this definition really means, I’m not quite sure because I don’t read), and say such phrases as “managey-uppy” and “i am so cries”. Does the internal monologue that is constantly running in this perspective, which then is transcribed onto this journal entry count as being written? Maybe I’m just as decent at organizing my stream of consciousness to put to a page, as I am making efficient procedures around shopping. 😀
I calm my slight annoyance with a laugh, and the thought that I often think of this work bff as my girl-friday, since I always have one in any group I’m in. This is usually the girl I bounce ideas off of, seek relationship advice from, rant to, have lunch with daily, trust completely, strategize with and talk about tv shows. Don’t worry, if you’re reading this I’m actually just kidding, there can be boy-fridays too.
Didn’t want to do dishes tonight, so instead of cooking went straight to KFC after work. Huzzah. On the way out of the driveway of the drive-thru I was blocked completely in by this bus. On a positive note, it happened to stop perfectly for a 3rds perspective photo.
Now off to start packing. Am wondering how well I’ll do on vacation without being able to buy anything.